Hey guys! This week was Mission Adventures week. So we moved on out of our nice, comfortable house and into the basement of New Life Ministries Church to do some service and learning over the week. As soon as we moved in, Devon made a nice little fort out of all the nursery toys. Ha!

"Devon's Palace"

The week was amazing. Our eyes were opened. We've left inspired. And broken.

We started the week off by panhandling downtown. This was not necessarily to make money for outreach (ha), but to get a better understanding of what it's like. I made three dollars in four hours. And I was definitely discouraged by how I was treated. It felt as if I became invisible and lower than dirt as soon as I stepped onto that sidewalk.

"Sir, do you have any spare change?"

Desensitization hurts. Sometimes I never even got a response. Jas even got a few hands in the face. After an hour or so, a man finally looked at me and asked why. I told him the truth - that we're trying to get the experience in order to know what it feels like. He laughed, told me how awesome that is, and gave me a dollar. Later, a woman I had asked came back with two dollars, looked at me with eyes of compassion (I can't even express how much that meant to me), and told me where I can get help.

We also tried near the University of Winnipeg, which is also downtown. The contrast in response was drastic. I didn't make any money, but every single person looked me in the eye and acknowledged me. What a difference that makes. I now know that even if I don't have any change to give, friendly gesture is so encouraging. Acknowledgement is vital. I pray to God that I will never pass someone by again. Because now I know how it feels.

Tuesday, we worked at Union Gospel Mission, a soup kitchen/rehab center/drop in. I worked in the kitchen in the morning with Carolyn. So fun! Jeff, the head chef, and Henry, an old German man who volunteers there, were so hilarious. I laughed my head off. That was a good day - I can't say I agree with how UGM works, but I know that God is doing incredible things in and through that place.

That night we went to the youth correctional center to lead their rec program - gym time! One of the first things I noticed was the immense love that the staff had for the kids. It didn't matter what they were in there for, the people who work there love them and see them as great kids, which they are! We got a tour of a "cottage" (a unit of cells), and all the guys in there were banging on the doors and yelling for attention. Wanting to get out? Excited about new people? Not sure... In the gym, we played pin guard, lineball (a new game for me), and basketball! It was really fun and the kids were very sweet.

Wednesday was our cultural day, so we didn't actually go out into the community, but spent time in our classroom. We talked about how to serve and understand people of different cultures. We played a game in which Devon and I were two missionaries trying to get to know and give the Good News to two different tribes. We sat in a room for 20 minutes waiting for instruction. Ha - the curiosity drove us nuts! As soon as we were "released" into the abyss to meet the tribes, we realized what we were in for. "I love Lucy, I love Lucy!" "Oi!" "Rawr!" "Spalding!" "Napple!" "Ooga Booga!" Uhm, what? We had to decipher their language and attempt to understand their customs. Devon and Carolyn both ended up dead. We all worshiped one tribe's god, but Devon and I refused to respect their chief (Crystal) - we thought worship was simply a game they played and to respect Crystal we had to worship her - and that wasn't the case at all. Oof! That definitely made me realize that things aren't always as they seem and that it takes crazy amounts of time to fully (or even partially!) understand the customs, traditions, languages of other cultures.

We also talked that day about how implicit the Bible is. No where that we've found does it outright say that gay marriage is wrong. No where in the Bible that we've found does it explicitly say that polygamy or premartial sex is wrong. It may be implied, but that's up for interpretation. So... everything I always thought was wrong is maybe not? Things aren't always black and white - there's so much gray area. I'm becoming more convinced that God cares about our wellbeing (and the wellbeing of others) and about our hearts. I was at first frustrated because many of my beliefs about right and wrong have been shaken (not to say they don't still hold), but God has been clearing it up by encouraging me to simplify. Love Him. Love people. Everything else will follow. "Just love Me." I can seek Him and His wisdom, but first and foremost is always love.

Thursday was "plunge" day. We were sent out with a quarter, three bus tickets, and a few bag lunches. Purpose: to get to know the city of Winnipeg through the eyes of the people. Have conversations. Share a lunch with a panhandler or needy person. Get to know the people who live here. Crystal, Carolyn, and I (the C group!) wandered around for a bit, rode the bus, talked to people... Then we headed downtown and met a BUNCH of panhandlers - seriously, like a little community of them. Archie, Rick, Sam ("Scuzzy"), Darlene, Mary Sue, Adrien... We shared our lunches with them and talked with them for a little while - it amazed me to see their generosity with each other, even when they finally got something that they're in such need for - until we got kicked out by the biz (neighborhood watch, if you will). I had a funny moment when one of the biz recognized me - he had kicked me out from in front of a business on Monday when I was panhandling there. Ha - really made me feel like part of their community.

We then headed to a bus hub to warm up a little and we met Brian and his mother-in-law, Rose. We could tell that they were also both in need. Brian was... how shall I say it? Not sober. He proposed to me within three minutes of talking to him (which confused me since he clearly had a wife, having a mother-in-law and all... and don't worry, I said no). Needless to say, there were many inappropriate comments during that conversation. It's difficult when they're drunk because I didn't feel like I could actually talk to them - and would they even remember? I suppose God can use the impact, yes, it's just hard to communicate and actually have a conversation with drunk people.

We also did what we call "roses" that night. It's a prostitute ministry in which we go around the North End and West End (the rough patches) and hand out roses to prostitutes with the message that they're loved, valued, beautiful. It's hard to believe that on a regular basis, they get such strong opposing messages to that... Can you imagine never being told "I love you?" I can't. I tried. It was insane going to the North End. We drove around in a van to an industrial part of town. Kim told us that there is no reason for someone to be out there at that time of day except for prostitution. There was a girl here, a girl there... all "normal" looking. If a guy was walking around, he was most likely a pimp. A car driving down that street? Ninety-nine percent of the time it was a very nice looking car (doesn't quite fit in with the neighborhood...) with a middle-aged man looking around. For something. Hmmm, I wonder.

The way it worked is that three of us would get out of the car: one with a rose to approach the girl and see if she wanted to talk and two to stay back a bit and pray. It was all up to the prostitute. If she wanted to be left alone, she was. If she ran, we didn't chase her. If she wanted nothing more than the rose, ok. If she wanted to talk, we were available for as long as she wanted.

This was my favorite and most valuable part of the week. Yeah, most of the prostitutes knew what we were doing and some yelled at us, rejected us. Some simply accepted the rose with a thank you and didn't really seem open to conversation (which is fine - we know what God can do). But I had one of the most life-changing talks of my life. I approached a young girl - I'm going to choose to omit her name just in case - while Jas and Devon prayed for me. I could tell she was new to the trade because she was confused as to why I was giving her a flower and telling her she's beautiful. She isn't from Winnipeg - moved here a couple months ago. From what I could tell, she was my age or younger. My guess would be younger. She has no one. No family in Manitoba. No friends. No one. And when I mentioned places that could help her, she didn't know any of them (even though we were standing only a block away from one of them). And get this. Thirty seconds into our conversation, she tells me that she knows Jesus and whips her Bible out of her purse. Ah! Awesome!

"Even though Christ is in my heart, life is still hard. Really hard."

When I agreed with her, she encouraged me. "Oh but don't give up! Don't give up!" Wait - aren't I the one who's supposed to be encouraging you, lifting you up? I was amazed by her faith, her hope, her wisdom, her strength. Oh my goodness, it was unbelieveable. She let me pray for her. She let me hug her, and as I did, words straight from the Lord flowed out. I just kept telling her how incredibly beautiful I thought she was. And I truly believe that. She was gorgeous. Stunning. Radiant. It didn't matter where we were or what I knew she was doing. The girl was so beautiful.

That experience made me realize that sometimes there's little choice - not only with prostitution, but with any other result of a desparate situation as well. I could have just as easily been in her position. Whose decision was it that I be blessed and her not so much? How did that happen? It's things that are out of my control that led me to not have to even think about making a choice about prostituting myself. It has never even been an option. For some people, it's not that easy. It seems as if there's no other way.

I could just as easily been in her position.

I'm going to just try to move on with this blog. Even revisiting that four days after impacts me so much. Oof.

Friday we went to Siloam Mission, a soup kitchen/shelter/health care center/etc! The funny thing is that it's right next door to UGM, which does things along the same line. It seems that they're in competition, but I'm not really sure... We first helped in the kitchen for them to serve breakfast and then got the grand tour afterward. It blows my mind how much they do. One difficult thing about justice is that it looks to the root of the problem, and I think that's harder and more demanding! Mercy feeds the hungry, but justice asks and demands to know why they are hungry in the first place. Justice calls out a desire to create self-sufficiency instead of dependence. But at Siloam, I saw justice as well as mercy. They feed the hungry and shelter the homeless (in a very nice facility I might add), but they also provide health care (from volunteer professionals), help people get trained in skills and actually get jobs, provide counseling for families to get back on their feet... I mean, WOW.

Things you guys can pray for:

For the prostitute I met. Don't worry, God knows her name and who she is. Just that God would provide a way out for her, that she would have more choice in how to provide for herself. That she would easily find places like UGM and Siloam, places that represent an alternative. That she would take the Lord's words to heart and understand how beautiful and loved she is. That a different life would be made available to her.

For outreach preparations! It's gearing up - and I think it's safe to say that each of us feel unprepared in one way or another. Finances. Emotional and mental states! Reflections, devotions, and other things we have to lead while we're there. Simply being ready to be ruined.